If you watched Sunday's "Mad Men" finale, then you know how amazing it was. And you probably also want one of these now, am I right?

And they come in a variety of colors! (You're picturing Joan Holloway Harris wearing the green one right now, aren't you?)

What is it with people and subways lately? You've got to respect the yellow line, people.

There's a lesson here about being stumbling drunk in public, but let's focus on the bright side instead: at least she wasn't driving, right? Responsibility win. I think.

I just saw the following commercial on TV. It's an ad for special cake pans that, when used together, make what appears to be a colossal cupcake:

Now, I don't know anything about anything, but isn't the point of cupcakes to have a self-contained cake that fits neatly into your hand; one that comes with its own little skirt to emphasize the fact that it's its own independent treat?

Why would you want a cupcake that is, as advertised, 25 times bigger? That's just a regular cake, if you ask me: one that requires cutting, a plate, a utensil for eating...

I know I'm taking this way too personally, but I officially hate the giant cupcake. It's false fun, and I'm insulted by such a blatant attempt to take advantage of my innocent affection for cupcakes.

Damn you, world. Is nothing sacred?

Remember the soccer player who dropped an opponent with a vicious tug of her ponytail?

This horse saw that and was all, "B****, that's not how you pull a tail."

Yesterday was National Nachos Day, and I totally missed it. I missed it.

Here is my promise to you, the American people: I will make up for this oversight in a big way in the upcoming days and weeks until National Nachos Day comes back around.

7-Eleven nachos, ballpark nachos, Nacho Bellgrande, Nachos Supreme, Fully Loaded Nachos, Irish Nachos, steak nachos, chicken nachos, Nacho Libre -- no nacho will go unturned or undigested until this mistake has been rectified.

Count on it.

Try as you might to avoid it, I'm sure you've heard at least part of that Miley Cyrus song where she's caterwauling about listening to Jay-Z. It's unavoidable.

You know what's totally avoidable, though? Jay-Z songs, at least for Miss Miley. Check out her answer when she's asked in an interview which of Jay-Z's songs she's singing about (skip to 2:55 for the response):

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Well, I guess this is one way to get people to pay attention to college soccer.

The list of people waiting to high-five that faulty appendix is growing.

The National Enquirer is reporting that Kevin Federline and his sperm of steel stood too close to girlfriend Victoria Prince and now she's knocked up with what would be his fifth child. That's not really what this post is about, though.

This is what this post is about:

Is it me or do they look like a backwards 10?

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I just read this story about a 56-year old woman in Pennsylvania and her 35-year old daughter who were busted for stealing a Walmart gift card from a 9-year old who'd set the card down on a shelf as she was being helped by an employee. On her birthday.

To avoid jail time, the women agreed to a more unusual punishment: for 41 and a half hours, they will sit/stand in front of the courthouse holding a sign that reads "I stole from a 9-year old on her birthday. Don't steal or this could happen to you!"

So I'm wondering: does the punishment fit the crime? My first reaction is to say yes. Jails are overcrowded. Public humiliation -- and worse, online humiliation -- that's a pretty decent alternative. Now, if the women had been forced to twirl the sign, or pretend to air guitar with it, then I would have said too much.

What say you? Is it time to start finding more creative solutions to California's crime problem?

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