Not anytime soon by the look of things. Which, is probably OK when we get stuff like “Spank! The Fifty Shades Parody,” which just announced a one-night only performance July 13 at the Saroyan Theatre.
This new imagining of the characters comes to life with sharp-witted comedy, musical numbers, sexy striptease performances from the leading hunk, plus lots of surprises! Get there early for pre-show cocktails then stay to meet the cast and pose for a photo with Mr. Dangerous himself!
**Pre-show cocktails and after show meet and greet are not available for every performance. Please check with your box office.
Grab your girlfriends and don’t miss the most exciting show of the year!
So everyone is clear: “SPANK! The Fifty Shades Parody is not associated with, nor authorized by, author E.L. James or Vintage Press.”
Pre-sale tickets are $38 and on sale today and tomorrow. The password is fifty.
If that seems a bit quaint, keep in mind Dunham has a puppet, Achmed, who is a dead terrorist. So this isn’t you father’sgrand-father’s … it’s not what you’d expect, let’s say. Unless you’re one of Dunham’s millions of fans. Time Magazine called “the most popular comedian in the United States.”
He brings his “Disorderly Conduct” tour to the Save Mart Center on Sunday, and we have a pair of tickets to give away. Just leave a comment and tell us which is your favorite Dunham character. Deadline for the contest is 3 p.m. Friday.
The guys from The Dumb Drum are back with another installment of their most hilarious Cross Streets series, in which they examine various local intersections. For this one, they head downtown to Divisadero and Fulton. I had an actual LOL moment in this one.
Dumb Drum’s Cross Streets series is easily one of the best things on the Interwebs of Fresno. Brodiemash and Bryan are back with their third installment, this time covering all 360 degrees of The Belmont Loop. If you missed the first two Cross Streets installments, you can see them here.
This College Humor parody pairs the Black Eyed Peas’ hot garbage hit song “I Gotta Feeling” with a dash of “The Hangover”-esque humor. Oddly enough, the pain this guy feels in the video is a lot like the pain I feel when I hear the original song.
I now want to beat the Black Eyed Peas with baseball bats.
This is way better than making a lame flier for your event. The guys from the Spanspek Music & Arts Festival made this funny video to help spread the word about their festival, which is Sept. 18 in Orosi. Most of the video doesn’t deal with the festival — it’s just funny.
The whole thing came together in 20 minutes, so I figured I’d ditch prepared questions and just let Kathy run with it. Of course, she did — harping on homophobes, her mom, winning Emmys and how she needs at least 20 protestors in Fresno.
You can download or listen to the MP3 below. The words version is the cover story in Friday’s issue of 7, so pick that up and give it a read.
While grabbing some grub at Chris Meat Market the other day, I saw this ad outside (in plain sight) — hoping, apparently, that people want to grab on some other stuff.
As far as I can tell, this is an ad for a prostitute who charges $25 per hour (but will also work for hamburgers). Should you be interested, you’d also need to pay for a hotel. Maybe it’s just me, but the hamburger part makes it seem a little suspect. What do you think? And more importantly, who’s going to call and report back?
And if, after all that, you’re asking, “Wait, I thought it was April Meat Market,” then consider yourself officially on notice that the name is once again Chris Meat Market. Here’s a photo to prove it.
It’s all the local news and stuff from the blogosphere that you need to Fres-Know. It’s been a while, so we’re giving you a big one. Don’t dare say it.
KMPHATE? The top item on the GLAAD blog is about how KMPH aired a paid, anti-gay infomercial on Sunday. We have to ask: WWKD — what would Kopi do? [GLAAD Blog]
HIGH JINX: If an airplane has trouble, but only bloggers care … is it news? Mike Scott thinks so and is all over it. [CBS 47]
CAR DASHING: Two girls paid top dollar to meet Kim Kardashian at The Edge on Friday night. After hours of waiting, that didn’t happen, so they dashed outside, intercepted Kim as she left, got invited into her limo, then sent the pics to a vacation blog. [On Location Vacations]
GET OFF MY LAWN! Do you hate people? Wish they’d leave you alone? (I’m thinking of one blogger in particular) Or do you just wish those pesky solicitors would stop knocking at your door? Either way, check out this hilarious sign. [On Edge 559]
My favorite ongoing SNL sketch, “Celebrity Jeopardy!” made a triumphant return during last weekend’s season finale. As usual, we got Will Ferrell as a downtrodden Alex Trebek, Darrell Hammond as a maniacal Sean Connery and a few other “celebrities.”
I got so nostalgic for “Celebrity Jeopardy!” that I collected every sketch below. Now go waste an hour or two laughing about Anal Bum Covers.
Move over, Enzyte … Pos-T-Vac has firmly grabbed the top spot for awkward penis commercials. Have you seen this? I promise it’s worth the two minutes of your life:
Let’s ponder the following:
- Guy laying underneath woman on the tire swing and turning her around. Hmmmm.
- “Gentle suction.”
- Ringing endorsements from Guy Who Looks Like Stephen King, Guy Who Has Tried Everything and If You Have a Brain in Your Head Guy.
- Company president who shares a name with a local blogger.
- Putting a vacuum near your junk.
I’m enamored with this Cleveland “tourism” video I found yesterday. Both H-Mac and I had the same reaction: “We should make one for Fresno.” But we’re neither musically nor videoally inclined. (I’m still trying to figure out if I can make a Swede).
Warning: Language NSFW
But I know we got some film geeks in this town. If you make it, I’ll post it. If you want to not make it, but instead laugh at Cleveland … I’m OK with that.
If you’re a fan of 80s baseball players, old-school baseball video games or white rappers, then you’ll love this. It’s a dude named Jack Cracker from Wisconsin rapping over the theme song from R.B.I. Baseball. Warning: Language NSFW.
Many thanks to ex-Bee reporter Jeff Passan — who fits all three categories above — and his Yahoo Sports posse for finding this and sending it over.
South Park slayed ‘Ye last night. It was a pretty hilarious episode in which Jimmy and Cartman came up with “the funniest joke ever.” Short version: “Do you like fish sticks? Then you must be a gay fish.” Kanye, of course, doesn’t get it and thinks that everybody is calling him gay. Carlos Mencia gets involved along the way and South Park gives it to him good too. My favorite part was Kanye’s crew:
If you think they look a little absurd … well yeah, but it’s also pretty right on:
I’ve always wanted to have a blog that called out people who don’t know how to park their cars. I’d post pictures of how crappily people park so we could all laugh at them, thus quelling the urge to actually key their car.