Look, I’m as tired of hearing about Tiger Woods as the rest of you, but I’m now also irritated with the press releases I’ve been getting with companies trying to leech themselves onto this scandal.
This one — subject line: “Safe Sexting Story Idea” — that landed in my inbox this morning particularly made me gag:
As texting has become the most popular means of communication today, it’s important to be aware of what these texts are implying. “Sexting” scandals have been making headlines for the past few months from celebrities like Tiger Woods and Carrie Prejean to teenage suicides are just a few to have recently been accused.
As the CEO behind largest paid mobile community, Predicto, Eyal Yechezkell would like to offer your readers tips on what to look for if suspicious that your partner, child or even friend is “sexting.”
CEO of Predicto, Eyal Yechezkell offers the following tips to investigate a person’s texting habits:
a. Is this person texting during the day or mostly at night when others are already sleeping?
a. Has this person significantly increased their amount of texting and do they seem distant from all other social interactions?
a. Has this person’s attitude or behavior changed in anyway?
a. If the person leaves their phone unattended, check for messages that can be considered “sext-messages”
a. If you do not notice text messages on a cell phone, check the phone bill which provides all of this information each month and make an accusation accordingly
Please let me know if you would like to schedule an interview or speak with Eyal regarding tips on investigating “sexters.”
If this wasn’t bad enough, I got another press release from the same flack, pushing the same company a few hours later. It’s also pretty laughable:
I hope you are well! I wanted to offer you the following story idea on Predicto Mobile’s Top 5 Celebrity Sexters of 2009! Please let me know if you are also interested in Predicto.com’s tips on how to identify if your partner is “Sexting” or if you would like additional information on this topic.
“Sext-ing” has been headlining the news over the past year surrounding guilty A-listers who can’t seem to control the urge. Because some of Hollywoods hottest scandals have started via text, Predicto.com, the largest paid mobile community would like to honor the years Top 5 Celebrity “Sext-ers” featured on Predicto.com in 2009:
5. Vanessa Hudgens: The High School Musical Star texted some nude photos to boyfriend, Zac Efron which were accidentally leaked over the internet.
4. Jon Gosselin: Instead of paying attention to his 8 kids, Jon Gosselin was caught “sexting” with a much younger girl, Hailey Glassman eventually causing a very public divorce with wife Kate.
3. Chris Brown: When Rihanna caught her R&B singer “sexting” with another girl, she started an argument which led Chris Brown to severely beat her and prevent them both from making it to the Grammys that evening.
2. Carrie Prejean: The former Miss California admitted to “sexting” with her boyfriend on the TODAY SHOW.
1. Tiger Woods: The Golf pro was accused of being caught “sexting” with another woman, by his wife who was outraged and caused a car accident.
And finally, I got this press release from the same agency as the other two above. Different e-mailer, different client, same sleaze. Subject link was: “Tiger Woods and other Hollywood Cheaters Who Deceived with the Help of the Poker Face.”
Online gaming website GR88.com recently issued the Top 5 Celebrity poker faces for 2009. However, in light of the recent Tiger Woods scandal, the company is beginning to realize that other celebs have really had the best poker faces all along: namely, those guilty of a clandestine affair.
So who rounds out the pack? This new list is full of two-timers ranging from politicians and elite athletes to A-List Hollywood honchos. Below GR88 revamps the list to award the best poker faces to Hollywood’s biggest cheaters, all who denied a widely public scandal with the genius use of the illusive poker face.
Receiving top honors is this week’s fallen hero, Tiger Woods.
#5 JUDE LAW
It’s hard to imagine what would make someone cheat on popular blonde and international fashion symbol Sienna Miller, but Jude Law devastated his fiancÃ© with an affair in the summer of 2005. Not straying very far, Law ignited a relationship with his children’s nanny, which he vehemently denied when it splashed across the tabloids. Finally confessing and ultimately losing Sienna in the process, Jude had us all fooled with his boyish good looks and stoic demeanor throughout the ordeal, awarding him the 5th best cheating poker face.
#4 ALEX RODRIGUEZ
No amount of home runs or contracts worth million of dollars could help this all-star athlete save face when he was spotted across town with strippers while on the road for baseball. However, once this ball player started up an affair with one of the most recognized celebrities of all time – international sensation Madonna- he used his poker face to deny sleepovers and the relationship at large. Finally coming clean and ending up losing his wife in the process, A-Rod proved his poker face prowess to the world, giving him the #4 slot.
#3 BRAD PITT
It’s hard to imagine Hollywood without the formidable force known as Brangelina, but there was a time when Brad Pitt was happily married to America’s sweetheart Jennifer Anniston. After repeatedly denying allegations of his affair with sexpot and Mr. and Mrs. Smith costar Angelina Jolie, the vixen admitted that they fell in love on the movie set – while Pitt was still married – in a national magazine interview. This ultimately destroyed Brad’s stonewall poker face and stance that there never was an intramarital affair. However, he had us and the world fooled for months, which lands him third on our list.
#2 BILL CLINTON
It’s safe to say that Bill Clinton will never look at a cigar the same way again. After denying his affair with intern Monica Lewinsky on national television by proclaiming his now infamous line “I did not have sexual relations with that woman” – he eventually came clean with wife Hillary by his side. However, as seen by his poker face above, Bill fooled us all until mounting evidence forced a confession that stirred the nation: helping him capture the #2 spot.
#1 TIGER WOODS
When Tiger Woods car crashed over the weekend, little did we know that the rest of his world was about to come crashing down as well. As further details and accusations of infidelity following the crash are immerging, additional allegations of cheating are pouring in as well. Recently apologizing for “transgressions” and letting his family down, our fallen hero can no longer deceive with his poker face – awarding him the #1 Spot on the “Hollywood Cheaters Who Deceived with the Help of the Poker Face.”
PREVIOUSLY ON THE BEEHIVE: It didn’t take long