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Who you got in the 2009 National Douchebag Tournament?

Holy Taco’s National Douchebag Tournament is — like college basketball — down to its Final Four (warning: sorta NSFW). Consider this more proof that everything, even douchbaggery, is better when in bracket form.


I have a feeling Octo Mom is going to take it. She’s already defeated Chris Brown, P. Diddy, Dane Cook and Perez Hilton, so she’s faired well against tough competition. Barry Bonds (who beat Terrell Owens in the Elite Eight) shouldn’t be close.

On the old white guy side of the bracket, Bernie Madoff and Rush Limbaugh should be a more even bout. Madoff is certainly more criminal, but when we’re talking douchebags, I think Rush is tops.

If you wanna see the past brackets, go here — again, sorta NSFW.

Responses to "Who you got in the 2009 National Douchebag Tournament?"

wet towel says:

um, Mike?
when you click on the link for the previous brackets? It throws you on ‘Holy Taco’ which, judging by the lack of attire on the young ladies that pop up all along the right of the screen would not clear the Porn filter –and probably should be considered NSFW.

Mike Oz says:

Thanks, Towel — I adjusted a bit.

Chris H. says:

I pick one of the fat guys on the left. both of them are seriously screwed up.

Karma says:

can we still nominate G.W. Bush?

Anonymous says:

You want real douchebags, why not Keith Blowolbermann. The guy looks like he’s in dire need to get laid and he rarely cracks a smile, if that’s not a douchebag, then I don’t know what the word means.

How can I just pick one? They all deserve to win.

booey says:

Why Bonds over clemens ? Bonds trainer has been in jail for over a year and won’t give him up while clemens trainer gave him up right away so clemens is easliy the bigger douche!

MsJoey says:

That woman whose nickname I refuse to say should win then get the hell out of the US. I’m tired of reading about her.

MsJoey says:

by the way, I love how Chris and Karma almost always post within minutes of each other.
If I didnt know better, I’d picture you two sitting side by side with laptop ready saying, “You first honey!” “No, you first”

Chris H. says:

and I must have been when I posted that comment? when I said left, I really meant to say far right (winged) dudes.

First you got a guy that rips people off for Billions of dollars (not just a drug deal gone bad kids, this cat was a real criminal. You know what the greatest trick the devil ever pulled was right?) Not only did this guy get lots of people to trust him. but he also took lots of peoples money. To the tune of billions of dollars. And his shady-ness doesn’t stop at him, now his wife is trying to say she needs the the $62 million to survive. I got news for you lady, you need to live in a tent city, and see what life is like when you actually have to work for your money. I think this guy is really just a small part of the greedy corporate America, but he deserves everything that happens to him. I say put him in general population, but unfortunately, I think that when you’re rich (even if you stole it) you get to go to the state country club.

Rush Limbaugh? Dude’s an overweight, loud-mouthed, pill addict, who should be forced to live the rest of his life drinking Snapple, and listening to Obama speeches. Not unlike A Clockwork Orange.
Seriously dude, shut up. You were a fool in the nineties, and you are still a fool. I think what gets me is the Republican party actually considers you a good candidate for presidency. I guess seeing who they last thought would be a good idea, this makes sense, but in the real world, where people are tired of all the rhetoric, the lies, and the downright deceitful practices, you see what happens.

Honorable mentions? Jim Cramer, Any of the Automobile CEO’s, and anybody that still thinks that Obama is the cause for all this recession talk.

Renee N says:

I too am a little surprised Bonds is in the final four… ugh…

anywho… Madoff is a Douche!

Chase Sanborn says:

Wow, these are tough, Oz.

My first thought: OctoMom-douchebag…..eeeewww.

But in all nefariousness,

let me play sideline tout:

Bernie has huge huevos and blew everyone’s bracket to get here. Has questionable court presence.
Rush, meanwhile,obviously can’t go to his left…and is just a big fat ‘OXY’ moron.

Now the other pair….hmmmm…a little pricklier.

Bonds is even PRICKlier…but he can penetrate. NCAA could not find his championship cap size.
Octo-Mom belonged in the ‘Elite 8′, heh-heh. She runs the Box-and-One Defense and plays loose.

Gosh….I’m torn.

Stephen says:

Chase wins for NOT a douchebag. A million kudos for that wit.

As for me, Rush was champ 4 years running, so let’s have another winner.

Madoff the rookie was a major douche, but not to me personally, only to a few hundred investors.

Barry. Barry Barry Barry. He’s only a douche for his uppity moodiness, NOT for his (alleged – HAH) steroid abuse. He and A-Fraud and Clemens and McGuire and Sosa…the stuff they used when they used it wasn’t illegal then in major league baseball! And his doucheness has gone on for years, but he still put on one hell of a show. Homerun king, always a threat, 9 gold gloves. Nah, he gets a pass.

Where was OJ?

Anyways, it’s OctoBlob by a mile. She shouldn’t have been allowed one child, let alone 14. Madoff didn’t ask to be in the news. Octocrap is doing her ridiculous web thingie, giving interviews, tipping off paparazzi, shopping for reality tv shows.

It’s Octoslut by a mile on this one. I, for one, do NOT want her to move out of America. It’s a free country, and she’s free to have her children taken away by CPS and she’s free to go to jail soon for some sort of criminal conduct, or at least for abject stupidity.

Dubya, by the way, is disqualified. You can’t compete on the bracket when you’re a professional douchebag.