I don't think I could do any better than the above headline and this update on the sausage-robbery story from The Bee's news side. So I'm just going to give it to you straight ...

A Sanger man accused of throwing Pappy's seasoning in one man's face and attacking another with an eight-inch sausage during an alleged home break-in has been released from custody pending further investigation.

"After reviewing the report, we decided we just didn't have a case at this time," Assistant District Attorney John Savrnoch said.

More evidence? As in the sausage? We all remember what happened to that, right? A dog ate it. Call the crime scene unit -- I see this story only getting better. But for now, people of Fresno, hide your sausage and lock your fridge. You could be in sausage-slugging danger.