Okay, here we go. I had so much fun trying to figure out that blind item the other day, I think I'll try composing one myself:

Which alcohol monitor bracelet-wearing red-haired star of Mean Girls whose first name has 2 syllables, begins with an L and rhymes with Skinsay Blohan was formally booked on charges of misdemeanor drunk driving yesterday in Beverly Hills?

I'll give you a hint:

People.com reports that Lindsay Lohan arrived at the Beverly Hills police station with her lawyer yesterday afternoon, was charged, and then was released on $30,000 bail.

If you'll recall, Lindsay was cited for D.U.I. in May when her Merecedes was found crashed into a bush, and a "small amount of usable cocaine" was found at the scene. Subsequent tests showed that she had coke and twice the legal amount of alcohol in her system. She is being charged now because at the time, Lindsay was being treated for injuries stemming from the crash. Then there was that whole rehab thing. And the extended rehab.

Now it's time to pay the piper, apparently. You know what? I bet she's not scared. I hate to say it, but Paris Hilton, in her own highly skanky way, really paved the way for celebrities looking to up their publicity with a little jail time. The Hollywood It Girl rite of passage used to be having sex with Stavros Niarchos, but these girls are fast becoming some kind of super strain of mutant celeb; above it all - including oily shipping heirs and the potential STDs that love them, and now the law.

What normally misanthropic red-haired blogger whose name begins with an "H" and rhymes with Weather McRain is suddenly scared for the whole human race?