Looks like the future of Fagan's Irish Pub is gloom. Owner Carrie Fagan-Davis sent out a mass e-mail just after midnight this morning explaining the two-week closure of the downtown pub: She's trying to figure out whether she can continue to keep Fagan's open.

It was a very heartfelt and interesting e-mail, giving us a glimpse into the mind of a downtown bar owner in Fresno's current climate. Her words are below, unedited, save for some spacing adjustments.

Thoughts?

I am sorry about the emotion and the mystery I have caused people to feel.

I am in a emotional state

So here is what is happening

This will be my last email for over the next two weeks ..As I need to decide if I can any longer continue with a business in downtown / Fresno .

I believed we were... one of the best places in the Central Valley for music concerts

I believed we had..... great food ( when it's fresh cooked ,it's sometimes isn't always perfect)

I loved watching people play Chess,Backgammon and doing paperwork in a relaxed place

I know for a fact we had..... some of the best beers, whiskeys and scotches in the Valley and that we are one of the few who cared to pour a perfect pint .

I thought that Fresno was ready for us.

But I am falling apart right now because "Fresno you didn't want us enough "

I was not a good owner as I let things show on my face ..People to often saw me as upset and tired. But know one knew what was happening behind the scenes. I put up everything I owned...and then I realized what I really put up to bring all those great things I mentioned above. I believed enough to put up My home to try to save this place (and later realized , where might my family sleep or what would happen to my dogs) I got scared.

I wanted Fresno to have a" REAL IRISH PUB" I wasn't slapping on a Irish name ..It was really authentic I had always believed in Fagan's Irish Pub and that I could make it happen.

But like a bad marriage , You cannot control what is not in your power.

I never imagined how much theft goes on (like bartenders who gave away free drinks,for better tips) (waitress's who thought money should go into their pockets ,rather than the cash drawer) (Customers who skipped out on paying)

I never imagined the volume of people who think because I am downtown, I should gives away everything for free or next to free. How many people tried to bring in their own food and beverage.or come in, just for Free water with Lemons ,Cherries and Straws (like we could pay the PGE on that) How bazaar !

Downtown Workers who felt food items should be under $5. and then try and split a $5.00 meal.(asking for extra bread ) Because they felt because it's downtown ,it should be cheaper !

Then there is the City Government . I am not a big business, so I got no financial breaks for being down here. I went before the City council and tried to change the parking .They did ...but not enough and still often gave out tickets by mistake .When someone gets a ticket it is mega horn to tell people not to come downtown .

And as for Parking.... You never here people say" I am not going to River Park or Fashion Fair because of Parking " But if you are lucky enough to get within a football field of the mall ,you did it by driving 5 times around and cursing the yo-yo who slid into your space.

The new Check points that the City is imposing on people.

I am the first to take charge of watching those who drink and would be driving .

But I do not agree with what the City is doing . To pull over cars ( like some foreign country might do ,and scare those who enjoyed a glass of beer or wine with dinner) why not bring back prohibition ? Just the fear of being pulled over is keeping people out of the Hospitality places. Not because they had been drinking to much, but just because it's nerve racking to be pulled over.

This industry has so many jobs out there .So many businesses that cannot afford lower volumes of people who want to have a evening out ....Is this America or what ?

It's like some communist country.

I do not want anyone hurt . It's My responsibility and my customers to control over drinking.
Most, now go to private homes .

Where if they are not responsible they can now consume a 12 pack for what they slowed down on at a business because it cost them so much more.

The City not working on a misconception that downtown is not safe .The City does nothing to change that.
We have less crime than any other area in the city !

I would rather be out at night in downtown Fresno than in River Park . I ran commercials telling people to check with the police dept on these facts.

Fresno, Downtown is not 10 years ago . It's a beautiful area .

You are lucky Fresno!

Your Baseball stadium is beautiful. Try looking at Visalia Baseball Park .
Yet, you will not spend $5.00 to park there !!!!

But spend $7.00 to $15.00 to park on the other side of town (then trash being downtown, cause you got a meter ticket) again refusing to eat or come downtown.

Fresno ,You need to appreciate what you have and I am sorry for what you are throwing away.

To give up ?

I would so miss the Music ..There is so many talented groups out there and they deserve to be heard. (in a place like we designed, out of a place always causing the police trouble )

I would so miss Friends of Fagan's (as you know who you are)

I am usually not a quitter and I believed in downtown and wanted to help

Thanks to the Media for all that you have done for Fagan's
Carrie Fagan's - Davis

I am sharing this information because, So many places go away and I always wondered why