OK, fess up: How many of us were strung along for a marathon three hours last night waiting to see if Joan Rivers would be the new Celebrity Apprentice?
(Slowly and sheepishly, I raise my hand, all the while insisting that I had my laptop computer busy all night answering emails and organizing photos and reading the latest New York Times stories about the faltering Tamil Tigers in Sri Lanka. But, hey, let's face it, I'll never get that prime-time chunk of minutes back. I could have driven to San Francisco in the time that NBC took dribbling out the result.)
Rivers beat out poker player Annie Duke, who provided one of the show's moments of high drama when she wished death on her extravagantly preserved opponent. (Rivers' face these days reminds me of a completely renovated boutique hotel.) But the poker player couldn't compete with the tartness of Rivers, whose famous rant about Duke's Las Vegas roots ("I've met your people in Vegas for 40 years and none of them have last names") has already achieved insult immortality.
I'm one of those johnny-come-latelys to this "Celebrity Apprentice" feud -- exactly the kind of viewer that NBC was hoping to snag with its puffed-up, padded-out three-hour event -- so I can't really speak to which of these two women "deserved" to win. What do people think? Should Joan have gotten the prize?
All I know is that Rivers was a hoot. She ran her final project -- a star-studded charity auction -- with the crackling authority of a wizened general, always ready with a sharpened one-liner. (Regarding teammate Clint Black's ego, she joked that he's so full of himself that if he went to a singles bar, he'd pick up himself.) Duke, on the other hand, came across as more of a grim corporate raider type. She'd probably be far better as a business mogul than Rivers, but she certainly couldn't compete with Rivers when it comes to TV charisma.
There was a telling moment on the live telecast that I found VERY interesting. One was when Clint Black told Trump that the person he should fire was his "editor." Could that have meant that the whole Rivers-Duke feud was pumped up by offering the public selective footage? I think so. Trump just let that comment slide right by.
And does anyone else think that the whole plot twist of the design firm quitting both contestants' campaigns -- ostensibly because Rivers was so rude to the owner -- was planned in advance, to heighten the tension? (Wouldn't those design professionals be completely all over the project 24/7 considering the millions of television viewers involved?)
I'm not surprised that in the end, Trump -- who with his weird orangeish mane and purring vanity reminds me of an old, tired lion ordering the lesser beasts around at the neighborhood watering hole -- went with the headline-grabbing comedienne. I'm sure he's hoping that he can get the name of her plastic surgeon.
Dang, I don't know what a celebrity apprentice is, but I sure thought that article on the Texas town in Sunday's Spotlight section was super cool.
(sorry, off-subject, but folks should really dig it out, if they still have yesterday's paper around.)
Ok, Joan Rivers comment to get us back on track:
She was cool on Pee Wee's Christmas special. (or was that Dinah Shore?)
i didn't watch the three hour finale. I actually DVR'd it and was going to watch it this weekend. However, I knew the outcome was going to be revealed to me someway, haha. Thanks Donald.
If Clint made that statement, he's right on. The Rivers' had their chances to beat Annie, but they couldn't come through. The fued with Annie was the only reason to keep her on. I think I can speak for the Apprentice crowd when I write this, we all wanted Jesse James in the finale, not Joan. If some people wanted the former playmate, Brandi, then I guess I'm not the only braindead person out there.
Since I didn't watch the finale, I can't really say who should have won. But over the course of this season, Annie really has been the best player. I will even say that she has been the best player ever on the Apprentice. She takes charge, she's fierce, and she'll point out the weak people on her team that didn't do her job. I think any corporation would love to hire Annie because she fits so well in a corporate setting. I'm surprised Donald didn't pick her, VERY!
But from the part I did see last night, Annie had Rodman, Brandi, and Tom Green on her team. Not really a bright cast of characters for the Apprentice. Maybe that had something to do with her not winning?
It's a shame that Jesse wasn't picked for the finale. I guess Donald doesn't want a blue collar worker winning the show. Jesse didn't display the corporate bravado that Annie loved to display, so maybe that cost him a spot. Donald loves money, and Jesse didn't bring in a lot of money, but I don't think that should have been used against him.
I will say, I'm glad Annie lost, but wish she would have lost to a better competitor. I didn't like Annie's "all about me" attitude. It was annoying. Plus I don't really like corporate attitudes that the rich and powerful display and her attitude was just that. But hey, if i was rich, i might step on little people as well, haha. just kidding about that.
Sorry I hit the link about the "faltering Tamil Tigers in Sri Lanka" and didn't finish reading what you wrote.
@Kiel: You found me out. My sole intention in posting about Joan Rivers was to get at least one person sidetracked in a story about the Tamil Tigers. My goal is to introduce an international-news angle in every celebrity story so we'll have a better informed populace.
Trump wasn't going to fire Rivers. He has been friends with her for 30 years and has to see her around New York. Annie wins in my book. In a charity competition she brought in triple the amount of Joan. I don't care if Joan's event was "funner"..money talks and $500,000 donated talks big.